Shithole by Sean Kelly

Roger fell out of nowhere and landed on his back in a trash covered field surrounded with barbed wire fencing. Amorphous clouds of puke swirled across a rust colored sky. The air was thick and wet, occasional gusts of hot wind brought with them the smell of wet dog fur and tooth decay. He sat up and noticed a group of people surrounding a bonfire, drinking bottles of glowing blue liquid and laughing. One of them looked over and saw he was up, the laughter stopped.

He thought about trying to run, quickly surveyed his surroundings and realized there were no apparent openings in the fence. The people were surrounding him now. The man directly in front was wearing a paper bag with eye holes over his head. A small second head had grown from his left pectoral muscle but looked to be dead. Next to this man was a skinny woman with baby legs, sitting in a wheelchair. Clusters of short blonde hair, that were burnt at the ends, grew from random spots on her crusty, peeling scalp. She wore a dirty red bikini over her track mark covered body. Next to her was a short fat man wearing a black leather jacket and aviator shades. His plastic yellow faceless head, and limbs made of tangled fishhooks and wire, all floated an inch from his round, levitating torso. His body emitted a low mechanical hum. Behind the three of them, was Roger’s teenage daughter who he hadn’t seen in over a year. Rusty metal tubing ran from her swollen eye sockets and in to the mouth and anus of a dead fish that she hugged like a teddy bear. Her long brown hair danced around her head like it was being guided by the static electricity of invisible balloons.

“Julie?!” Roger choked, teary eyed. “Is that you?”

“Dad…” she sighed. “What are you doing here?”

“Julie,” he stood and started to walk towards her.

Paper bag pressed his sticky, fingerless hand against Roger’s chest. “Back up, pal.”

“Don’t touch me!” He grabbed hold of the man’s arm. “That’s my daughter over there!” It took several hard yanks to rip the hand off.

“I’m sure it is,” Paper bag replied in a monotone voice. “Back up.”

“He’s alright guys,” Julie said. “Let him through.”

The group parted and allowed Roger past. He rushed over to her and opened his arms for a hug. She rose her fish in front of her and pushed him back with it. “No, dad. No sappy reunions.”

Roger’s heart pounded in his chest. “Julie! Where did you go? I came home one day and you were gone. I looked everywhere for you. Why did you leave?”

“I couldn’t sleep in that place anymore. I hadn’t slept in months. I had to get away, get some rest. I still don’t sleep well, but it’s better.”

“Why didn’t you tell me? We could have gotten you sleeping pills.”

“I was downing bottles of them every night, dad. Nothing would help. It was that place, that shithole.”

“So you came here?! You couldn’t even tell me you were leaving? We could have moved.”

“You wouldn’t have moved. You wouldn’t even let those real estate guys buy you out. And of course I didn’t tell you. Why would I? So you could stop me?”

“All this time… I thought you might be dead… Why here?”

“Because I didn’t think you’d ever find me here. It was the last place you’d look.”

“You were right about that. I’ve looked literally everywhere else. I traveled the entire world searching for you.”

“I know. We’ve been watching you in the bonfire. But there’s a slight delay, didn’t see you finding your way here until it was too late. I would’ve run again.”

“Julie… You’re sixteen. You’re too young to be out on your own. And with these people?!”

“Hey!” Baby legs called out with a gravelly voice. “These people? What are you trying to say?”

“I’m not going back, dad. I can’t. I’m sorry.”

“You are,” Roger said, becoming angry. He grabbed her by the arm. “I know you’re upset about your mom. You don’t think I am too? You leave me completely alone just months after she died? I won’t be alone anymore. I’ll drag you home kicking and screaming if I have to.”

“Sir…” Paper bag spoke. “We need you to let go of our friend. We don’t want to hurt you, but we will.”

“You won’t do shit. Come on, honey.” He yanked his daughter along with him as she fought to break free from his grip.

“Dad, no! Stop it!”

Paper bag pried Roger’s fingers from Julie’s arm and kicked him in the ass hard, sending him face planting in to the ground.

“Well guess who just fucked up?” Baby legs laughed, wheeling over to Roger.

Julie looked down at the finger-shaped bruises on her arm, just another set to the faded rows of similarly shaped bruises that lined both of her arms. “Dad… You have to leave now.”

“Leave?” Baby legs coughed. “Its too late for that.”

“I’m afraid she’s right, Julie,” Paper bag said. “He’s dangerous. We can’t risk him coming back.”

Roger attempted to get up but Paper bag placed his foot on the back of his head.

“He’s not dangerous, guys. Just stupid. Let him go.”

“Hey guys, check it out!” Baby legs said, pointing to a large circular lump under Roger’s T-shirt. “What’s that?”

“Hm. Hey Ned,” Paper bag motioned to Plastic head. “Come over here and take his shirt off.”

Plastic head waddled over and stuck his fishhook arms through the shirt and tore it to shreds, leaving behind bloody scratches. Roger had a big black hole in his back surrounded by a cushioned toilet seat.

“Seriously?!” Baby legs cackled. “This dude has a shitter on his back!”

“Well isn’t that something…” Paper bag replied.

“Leave him alone guys!” Julie pleaded, squeezing her fish.

“Looks deep,” Baby legs noted. “I wonder where it leads?”

Roger struggled to get up but Paper bag pushed his foot down on the back of his head even harder.

The dead head on Paper bag’s pec opened its mouth and let out a high-pitched screech as it emitted orange light from it’s throat. He bent over and illuminated the hole. It went down as far the light could go. “Ned,” he said. “Give me one of those bottles will ya?”

Plastic head ripped open his leather jacket revealing a robotic chest covered in wiring and lined with six circular slots. His head spun around rapidly as his torso vibrated. After a moment, his body sounded a bell, a bottle of glowing blue liquid shot out of one of the slots and landed at Paper bag’s feet. Paper bag picked up the bottle and started dumping it down the hole while Roger’s limbs flailed about. They all listened carefully and could not hear the liquid hitting the bottom.

“You think it’s endless?” Baby legs asked.

“I seriously doubt that,” Paper bag responded, as he dropped the empty bottle down the hole. “Well, maybe.”

“Enough guys,” Julie gritted her teeth. “Let him go,” she sternly demanded.

“That’s not happening, kid,” Paper bag said. “He shouldn’t have come here. Ned, rip his face off.”

Roger struggled under Paper bag’s shoe, letting out muffled screams through the dirt. Plastic head’s arms began spinning in circles, making the sound of a power drill, he headed towards Roger’s head. Baby legs laughed maniacally.

“I said let him go!” Julie raised her fish and slammed it against the top of Plastic head’s plastic skull, knocking his glasses off. He stumbled and made a series of beeping noises, began to malfunction. His head spun and body vibrated as he fired bottles from his chest, and ran around in circles. After a moment, he stopped and fell over, twitching and leaking blue liquid. His head exploded and slathered everyone in blue. 

Julie raised her dripping fish at the other two. “Now do as I say before you get some too.”

The sky lit up with multicolored neon lightning. Thunder struck. It began raining puke. Julie stood, fish in hand, staring them down. Baby legs was looking over at Plastic head’s corpse, oily black tears running from her eyes. Paper bag was staring back at Julie, his round sticky fists trembling. He lifted his foot off Roger’s head. Roger pushed himself up and spit dirt out of his mouth.

“Fine. You want your father so bad?” he marched over toward Julie. “Have him.” He stuck his hands to Julie’s eye tubes and lifted her up off the ground. She kicked and whacked him on the head with her fish over and over, he was completely unfazed by it. He stomped back over to Roger, who was attempting to stand, and kicked him in the ass. Baby legs rolled her wheelchair forward over Roger’s head and yanked on a lever that lowered her chair down tightly over his head. Paper bag held Julie over her father’s back hole.

“No! Please! Don’t do this!” Julie begged.

She released her fish, grabbed hold of the small head growing from Paper bag’s pec and pulled with all her might. It let out a shrill cry and shot light from its mouth as she ripped it off. Blood sprayed her face and the head slipped out of her hands, fell and tumbled down the hole. Paper bag screamed and shook Julie violently.

“Drop the bitch,” growled Baby legs.

Paper bag released his hands from her tubes with a suction cup pop. She fell down into the hole and managed to grab the toilet seat with one hand. He raised his foot and stomped her fingers several times until she released and went falling down into the abyss.

“Good luck sleeping down there, bitch!” Baby legs yelled.

***

Julie fell through darkness for hours before landing into sludge with the harshest belly flop imaginable. She splashed up out of the knee-deep green goo, gasping for air, and was in complete darkness except for a glimmer of orange light bouncing in the distance. She waded towards it, hoping not to trip on anything and wind up back under this shit. It was Paper bag’s extra head, floating across the surface. She picked it up and pointed it in every direction. The walls were made of flesh, lined with openings resembling anuses that leaked the sludge she was standing in. Every pet she’d ever had was here, dead and floating in this substance. A boy she dated in high school was down here too, his decaying top half hanging out of an anus. She shined the head light up into the hole that she’d fallen down. The hole quivered and clenched shut.

Julie followed this seemingly endless passage, finding more and more. Pieces of artwork she’d made, heroin needles that had disappeared from her dresser, a rusty license plate from her old car. Everything that had mysteriously vanished from her life was down here, floating around. Finally, she reached a fleshy wall. In the center was an orifice that looked like a giant, swollen vagina. With no other choice, she held her breath and pushed herself through the tight opening.

A small fleshy room surrounded her, the walls were glowing. She looked behind her and found the entryway was gone, there was no way out of this room besides a tiny hole on the ceiling that she’d never be able to squeeze through. In front of her, her mother had grown into the wall. She couldn’t tell where the the wall ended and her mother began. Her mother’s head and breasts hung motionless from the surface. Julie collapsed on her knees and wept at the sight. Suddenly, the walls convulsed then began to breathe. She shined the light on her mother’s face. Her mother’s eyelids shot open and her lips smiled.

“I’ve missed you, Julie,” she said.

“I missed you too, momma,” she began to cry.

“Come on now, sweetie. No sappy reunions.”

The walls convulsed again and sludge began draining from the ceiling hole. Julie walked through the waterfall of slime and stood in front of her mother. They looked into each others eyes. She knelt down and drank from her mother’s breast. As the room filled, she kissed her mother on the cheek and then laid against the wall beside her, hugging her dead fish like a teddy bear. Her mother sang a lullaby and she fell to sleep.